It's been a while...
Almost a whole year.
My last post I told you all that I was depressed. That I was.
Since my last blog post, I had failed in my relationship with my ex. We split just a week before our 3 year anniversary in November of last year. I felt good about the split at first, but then came the uncertainty that we all feel with any failed relationship or task. Things got better, things got worse. Everyone said time would make it better. I decided that I should focus on myself before I can seek out another relationship. That also... didn't happen.
An old friend of 10 years, whom I had had an enormous crush on for most of those years, had finally taken an interest in me. He was sweet, kind and always thinking of me. We dated for 6 months and then I ended things. Amidst all of the great things, there were some things that caused me to question things. At the beginning of this blog I told myself I would get rid of all of the negativity in my life and strive for a happier life.
So here I am a year later, and I think I can finally say I'm moving towards happiness.
"Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like & celebrating it for everything that it is."
I still have the same goals as I started out with on this blog. I just want to be better about tracking it, and keeping this updated even if it's with a short blog post.
Just 2 days ago I started a diet. I know everyone tells me "Why the hell are you on a diet!?" or "You don't need to lose any weight!!". It's not really about them, it's about me. I know I don't need to lose much, but I still would LIKE to lose some weight. To do so, I have to change the way I've been doing things. I have a meal plan in place that's meant to reset my metabolism and get me where I want to go. It hasn't been easy. When I'm not busy, and I sit down in front of the TV old habits kick in and I just want ice-cream or chips...
In other news, I now live with my best friend, and it's the best decision I've ever made. Living with someone who isn't a significant other for the first time, and someone who I get along with so well it makes living together incredibly easy, just makes everything in life so much better. This past summer was probably one of the best summers I ever had. She's my best friend and my sister and I know I can depend on her for anything.
I could probably ramble on forever, but I wanted to catch up. This blog was something for me to turn to, to document, and to put my feelings down so I can go back and see how I've grown, and to know that what I'm doing isn't all for nothing. It's also to share this with all of you, because I know I'm not alone in the struggle to find happiness.
~xo, Mookie
